Why Can’t a Man Be More Like a Woman?
By Janel Breitenstein
Broadway musical junkies recognize the lyrics. “Why can’t a woman be more like a man?” demands My Fair Lady’s Professor Higgins.
He comments to Col. Pickering, “Men are so pleasant, so easy to please. Whenever you're with them, you're always at ease. Would you be slighted if I didn't speak for hours?”
Women throw popcorn at the screen. Men might shrug: He’s got a point.
I, too, seem to wish my husband were a better woman. Women are so gracious! So wonderfully observant!
I’d love my husband to compliment my new blouse, gush when I look good. Like my friends. “Oh! You look so cute!”
I’d prefer he uses words like “sort of” before words of criticism. Does he have to mean what he says? I prefer “tactfully indirect.” Wheedling.
I’d like us to chat for an hour after work, maybe share a salad.
(Your husband may be the vegan extrovert. Work with me.)
Alas. God made my husband male for good reason. Not because we needed to be the same, but because I need a person exactly like him.
My exuberance needs his quiet contemplation. My parenting needs his deep voice, broad-shouldered presence, and gentle, logical firmness. He can’t notice my haircut more than my heart. And if I hear a noise at night, I prefer he wallop the bad guys.
Together, we look more like God’s image. God says both genders, together, reflect Him (Genesis 1:27).
Unfortunately, it’s not really in vogue for me to be pro-men as much as it is for him to be pro-women—for us to be for each other, needing each other and our gendered strengths profoundly, as the Body of Christ.
We need good men, just like they need good women. For all the ways we’re different.
The good stuff: The eye cannot say to the hand, “I have no need of you,” nor again the head to the feet, “I have no need of you.” (1 Corinthians 12:21)
Action points: In what ways do you wish your spouse were more like you? Take a look at the strong flip side of his or her weakness. What does this add to the two of you?
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